Last Minute Halloween Costume Ideas

And I do mean last minute. Look at the time…

  • Dig up your VHS copies of Tarkovsky’s Andrei Rublev in the pristine, never-been-rented boxes, put on some bikershorts, kneepads, and your Kozmo Goretex shell, and go as a lost delivery guy, like one of those Japanese soldiers who never heard the war was over. [note: doesn’t work if you’ve showered today. Or yesterday. And if you slept on the couch in your office.]
  • Put on a cashmere cableknit sweater, a suede jacket, and some loafers and go as Whit Stillman. [note: only works if you have showered today. And exfoliated. And hydrated.]
  • Put on a featherweight ice-climbing shell with more pockets than you know what to do with and a baseball cap and go as a director from Imagine.
  • Mosaic together a giant Powerpoint slide that says “Jobs Jobs Jobs Jobs” or “War War War War” all over it, sprayglue it to some foamcore, rig it into a backpack behind your head, and go as George Bush.
  • Wear whatever you’re wearing right now, don’t think about what you’re going to say, don’t even smooth your hair, and go as a guest star on K Street.
    Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have a winner.
    [update: I ended up going as pregnant by tying a feto of the world around my neck, a legacy of Jason‘s post about fetosoap. Moral: always keep a small pile of feti handy for parties.]